Ceremonies and Symbolism

I just read the description of the Olympic Games Opening Ceremonies that are supposed to be happening today. I don't think I'm going to tune in. For example:

"Rollerbladers in red body stockings with giant flames shooting out of their heads will zoom around the oval stage at speeds of 40-plus mph. Their odyssey is meant to symbolize the passion, speed and energy of both Italians and Olympic athletes."

I'm just not enough of a sap to find that inspirational. Red body stockings? Flames? I will undoubtedly get the giggles instead. When there are fake cows on rollers, and dancing trees, and some super-model in an Armani gown parading around with a flag - of all things to do in an Armani - I have to blush and turn off the TV. And hopefully that's before they get to the "performers suspended by wire in mid air" who are recreating a flying version of Boticcelli's Venus. Humph! Italians.

(And I say that in the same spirit as California Happy Cows said "Humph - Poultry" when making disparaging remarks about chickens.)

Actually, the Italians aren't to blame. I don't know why we can't let sports be sports and art be art. (Well, OK, that's a lie - I do know why - always follow the money. But still... ) The modern Olympic Games are pageantry, and perhaps such stuff just doesn't lend itself to description. It should be experienced. To the fullest, evidently.

The only things is, these are the winter games - and there is no snow in Turin?